In praise of a unique wedding

While my blog writing will increase, you will probably notice that I have a penchant for manifestos. I’m especially keen on spreading as many positive messages as possible, encouraging you to embrace your personalities, your love, your history and to have a unique wedding.

There is nothing I like less than hearing a vendor say “oh, but that wouldn’t look like a wedding”. To me a wedding doesn’t have to “look like a wedding” (which is actually short for “look like the average wedding”), it has to look like you. And you are unique.

So today I’m going to take some time celebrating your uniqueness, and encouraging you to embrace it. I am going to show you all the things you’re totally allowed to do on your wedding, if you feel so inclined. And if anybody’s complaining you can send them to me, sheltering you from peer pressure is my favorite part of this job!

1. You can wear a puffy dress – even if you’re always in jeans and a t-shirt. Yes, that’s right, that gorgeous princess-like gown you tried on just to please the shop assistant or your mother? And when you were inside it you suddenly felt like you belonged there, and it belonged to you? That’s the feeling you should be aiming at when shopping for your wedding dress, and who cares if your girlfriends will be confused or will feel like you made the wrong choice. Your heart and your stomach know better, trust them.

2. You can wear jeans and a t-shirt – they can be as special or as everyday as you want. If that’s where you belong, there is no need for you to get out of your comfort zone on your wedding day (I’m actually a strong supporter of comfort zones). Your partner will love you even more for having decided to celebrate your wedding at your most personal and sincere self. And we’ll make that pixie cut work too. I love brides who aren’t afraid to embrace who they are, they’re the most beautiful brides in the world.

3. You don’t need to get fit for your wedding – get fit for yourself, if you want, but don’t put this kind of pressure around the time of your wedding. There’s only one secret to looking gorgeous on your wedding day, and it’s not being fit or slim. It’s called being happy because you’re marrying the love of your life. I promise you, it’ll shine through.

4. You can elope – especially if your life is spent in the public eye, and there’s so much hype around your engagement. You only need those very special and very few people around you, the ones who never judge you, who always support you, who would stand in the line of fire for you. And you don’t need to justify your decision with anybody, either, not even your parents. Book that fancy restaurant on the other side of the world, where nobody will pay attention to you, except for celebrating how happy you look while holding your fiancé‘s hand. You can always have a party back home afterwards, and invite everybody there.

5. You can skip cutting the cake – and even throwing the bouquet. You make your own traditions by celebrating the moment that’s important to you, and I’ll create a celebratory environment out of whichever moment you want to underline. A first look before the ceremony. Serving a part of your meal to your guests yourselves. Sitting at as many tables as you want to join your friends during the reception. Having the first dance as a ring around the rosie. Anything goes, because it’s about you, and you’re unique.

Remember, it’s not about breaking the rules on purpose, or wanting to stand out. It’s about the beauty of truth, and if your truth doesn’t conform to common rules and traditions you should be entitled to break free and celebrate who you and your fiancé are.

I will stand by you in the process. That’s what I call planning a unique wedding.