The only important thing is… people

Those of you who follow my Instagr.am and Facebook account already know that last Monday’s wedding in Garfagnana was a unique and moving experience. As soon as I’ll have Francesco De Tito’s photographs I will be able to share them with you, but the most important lesson these 3 splendid days taught me is one that I will carry with me forever, and that is worth sharing with you.

You might think it’s obvious (and a tad self-deprecatory) but there is nothing that can make your wedding wonderful as people can. You might have hired the best wedding planner there is out there, or have the grandest of luck, the hugest budget, but if you don’t invite the right company to share it all with you, it’ll just be an empty shell. Splendid and gilded. But lacking what matters the most.

Keep this in mind all through the inviting process, because involving your work colleagues (people you often share the hours you like the least with), some vague relative that don’t even know your exact name, your parents’ friends, VIPs (maybe just because your mother asked you to), will not only have a huge impact on your budget for the reception, but it will also mean that you will be surrounded by people who care little or less about you. People who don’t really love you.

It’s a life lesson most of us learn at our own expenses, but think about it. Even in your daily routine if you objectively evaluate the depth of the feeling and relationships you have with your acquaintances you will realize the people you truly love (and who love you back) are less than 5-10% of the total. But the time you spend with them makes you happy, content, joyful. Whereas time spent with everybody else often deprives you of positive energy, leaves you indifferent or worse, nervous and angry. All of this is particularly true for your wedding day.

Trust me. If you want an epic, memorable (for you, not for wedding blogs/magazines) and truly splendid wedding, choose to invite only people you love and who love you back. Girlfriends who would spend two days cooking for all your guests, friends and relatives who would pop into the wedding hall to lend a hand at decorating (even if it’s unnecessary, just to help out), relatives who would put aside their misunderstanding to be with you on that day, not in a fake way, but truly giving up something they thought important, for your sake, and friends who would show their gratitude to whoever helped you planning it all. Simply because this help contributed to your happiness.

Nothing else matters.